There's a thing or three you guys don't know about me.
Like the fact that I can't touch my toes. And that I don't love mint chocolate chip ice cream. And that 79.9% of the time I'm a walking ball of stress but try really, really hard not to show it.
It's my job to be happy. It's my job to be enthusiastic. And most of the time, I really am! Alchemy and this blog depend on it. But let me tell ya, it's not always easy to play that role. The past few months have made me cry a lot of happy tears and more than a few sad ones. My job is incredibly rewarding but just as mentally taxing. The blog is growing but my ability to set aside the time it deserves is dwindling.
My family is coping with a few completely unexpected medical conditions, one of which happened just last night and inspired me to write this post. When you hear that the health of some one you love dearly is compromised, nothing else matters. I mean who wants to write about salmon burgers when your dad is in the hospital?
It's okay to cry.
At the end of the day, nobody's life is perfect. Social media may make our lives seem top of the line, but isn't that the point? I doubt I'd have much of a following if I posted pictures of a hospital bed or a failed recipe. I don't want to think about negativity and neither do you. It's toxic. We share our happiest moments on Facebook and Instagram and then we all kind of forget that that's only half the picture.
Remember yesterday when I instagrammed a picture of my ugly smoothie? Did you know that I was running ten minutes behind for a meeting? Or that I put too much stevia in the smoothie and that it actually didn't even taste that good? No, you didn't. All you see is some cute running shoes and a healthy morning cocktail. After all, I want to inspire you, not bring you down!
The point is that everyone has problems and everyone gets jealous of everyone else's lives. Don't get me wrong--I'm beyond happy with my life and my career and I know how blessed I am to have found my passion. But promise me you won't read a healthy living blog or see a picture on Facebook and think, "Ugh, that girl has the best life." I promise you that the person you're admiring is battling their own demons. We all are.
It's okay to cry.
So what's a girl to do when things are looking blue? There are a few things I do to de-stress, my favorite of which is lighting a candle. It sounds simple, but there's something about the light, the warmth, and the aroma that melts my stress away. I look so forward to jumping under the covers, propping up a pillow, lighting a candle, and responding to all of your blog comments. Sounds lame, but I swear it lifts my mood!
Another thing I tend to lean towards when I need to unwind is chocolate. Salted almond dark chocolate, to be exact. Sometime you just need to #treatyoself. Grab a spoon and dig into some Jeni's ice cream or nosh on your favorite treat. If you're like me, then eating makes you happy. And eating good food makes you really happy.
Of note, I'm shoveling spoonfuls of Sunbutter in my face and listening to Chocolate (by The 1975) Pandora on repeat as I write this post. Happy times.
If snacking on dark chocolate in the candlelight doesn't do the trick, then try taking a bath and using an exfoliator. For whatever reason scrubbing dead skin away always makes me feel refreshed, and there's something relaxing about putting lotion on. Nothing like a good clean up and a warm towel to raise your spirits!
Lastly, try to appreciate life and remember what you have rather than the things or people you don't. Remember your favorite food, your fondest memories, your best friends, your passions. Remember what makes you truly happy. Realize that they're probably not "things;" they're probably people, passions, places, memories. Remember that everyone has ups and everyone has downs.
I already feel better after writing this post. For me, writing is a release. You guys are like my therapist. At the end of the day, you really just have to try your hardest to stay positive. What do you have if you don't have positivity?
Most importantly, remember that it's always okay to cry. And to eat all the dark chocolate.
Because no one is perfect and perfect is lame.





GiselleR @ Diary of an ExSloth says
I have to say that I completely understand where you're coming from. My dad was diagnosed with cancer last summer and had surgery earlier this year. I live in an entirely different country from my parents so I don't always see the day to day effects of his illness, but it still takes it's toll on my mood and the blog, even thought I've never spoken about it there (per his request, since I knew before most of my fam).
I've taken a lot of breaks over the last year to deal with that and other stuff happening in my life. Sometimes I feel guilty that I'm not always on the ball with blogging but I know that other things are more important, so usually I just take the time to get myself right.
Sending lots of love and prayers to you and your fam <3
Karen says
I do demo's for COSTCO, the Cherry Pie could have been cooked better because the crust was raw and runny on some of the pies, so I mentioned to bake it longer. I thought a perfect idea to eating and the Apple Pie was ready cold out of the pan. I was told by COSTCO not to mention and let the members enjoy! I went home worried and feeling bad because my jobs mean a lot to me and want to always do my best!
Alexis says
Cheers to honesty!
Nikki says
So insightful and so cool of you to share. Love you to the moon!
Alexis says
Thanks Nik 🙂 XO
Daria says
Big ((hugs)) from Raleigh! It's hard to be happy all the time- it may be near impossible. Let it out, take some deep breaths and release the emotions. Don't bottle them up, trust me! We all have days that we are in a Debbie Downer mood and ya know what?? Such is life. We pick ourselves back up and keep moving. Hope your Dad is getting the medical help he needs. 🙂
Alexis says
Thanks, my dear! Deep breaths really help 🙂
Sarah Gifford says
Gosh you said that it's ok to cry but I never said it's ok for you to make me cry!! You're an ABSOLUTE inspiration and I'm thankful for you and your blog. I love your every single one of posts but this one is exceptionally heart wrenching. You da bomb.com
Alexis says
Awwww seriously Sarah, you are so sweet. I always love reading your comments! They truly make my day 🙂
Allison says
The only thing that is perfect is your curried brussel sprout recipe! Thank you for all that you do--it is all so appreciated!
Alexis says
Hahaha best comment ever! Thanks, Allison!
Anna B says
Thanks for sharing this. Today was just one of those days for me too -- nothing seemed good enough and it's refreshing to reaffirm that EVERYONE DOES CRY.
Also, I'm sorry to hear about your family struggles. I have gone through this myself, and I know how taxing it is. In the hardest times, I tried my best to always dress well. Just putting on nicer clothes and not wear gym clothes and t-shirts 24/7 was enough to help kickstart my day and make me feel good. I swear it helps!
Emily @ Glitz Glam Gluten-Free says
Oh man, I am right there with you on this post. A family member of mine had been in and out of the hospital this month and it's been so horrible and you are right, the last thing I care about in the worst of it is food pics in good lighting. Love the idea of lighting a candle though to wind down in the evening-- I'm going to do that tonight!
Alexis says
Exactly. I lit a candle tonight and it made everything feel so cozy!
Emily @ Glitz Glam Gluten-Free says
Oh man, I am right there with you on this post. A family member of mine had been in and out of the hospital this month and it's been so horrible and you are right, the last thing I care about in the worst of it is food pics in good lighting. Love the idea of lighting a candle though to wind down in the evening-- I'm going to do that tonight!
Kaylin @ Enticing Healthy Eating says
This post...hit home to me on so many levels today. As I have been writing on my blog lately, my father's health has been slowly getting worse due to his cancer diagnosis back in November. He passed away just 2 days ago. It was awful, it was terrible, he had to try to fight through pain of an infection taking over his body, and it was hard on my mother and I both. More than anything I can ever describe in writing. So, yes, I have done my own fair share of crying over the past few days. And it IS okay. I've cried randomly in public, and I don't care. Because I honestly think those who can feel their emotions and just let them out when they need to are the strongest among us. I do hope and wish for the best for you and your family (your father?...). And like you said, appreciate every single moment you have with your loved ones. They are all precious and should be lived and enjoyed to the fullest.
Alexis says
I'm so sorry to hear about your father, Kaylin. I cannot imagine how you feel. Why do bad things happen to good people?! It's so hard. You and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers! Promise me you'll take time for yourself--that's what's important right now. Crying in public is totally fine, too! We've all done it. XOXO
Kaylin @ Enticing Healthy Eating says
This post...hit home to me on so many levels today. As I have been writing on my blog lately, my father's health has been slowly getting worse due to his cancer diagnosis back in November. He passed away just 2 days ago. It was awful, it was terrible, he had to try to fight through pain of an infection taking over his body, and it was hard on my mother and I both. More than anything I can ever describe in writing. So, yes, I have done my own fair share of crying over the past few days. And it IS okay. I've cried randomly in public, and I don't care. Because I honestly think those who can feel their emotions and just let them out when they need to are the strongest among us. I do hope and wish for the best for you and your family (your father?...). And like you said, appreciate every single moment you have with your loved ones. They are all precious and should be lived and enjoyed to the fullest.
Jan Brulz says
Alexis,
Thanks for being so honest with your readers. I am so inspired by how you juggle all of the things in your life:) You are so correct in saying that people always think the grass is greener for everyone else, but it isn't. Everyone does have some type of struggle. They just don't broadcast it to the world. I think we all need to take your advice and find a support system that we can turn to. This can be a person, an book, a candle, a bath or maybe writing your feelings down in a journal. There are so many bumps in road as we go on with our daily lives. Take the time and celebrate some positive things ( making that great new smoothie, running a 5K or re connecting with a friend from your past). These things won't change the sadness you might be feeling but you need to know that your are one of a kind, and you are important to so many people. Take care Alexis and prayers for your dad.
Jan B
Jan Brulz says
Alexis,
Thanks for being so honest with your readers. I am so inspired by how you juggle all of the things in your life:) You are so correct in saying that people always think the grass is greener for everyone else, but it isn't. Everyone does have some type of struggle. They just don't broadcast it to the world. I think we all need to take your advice and find a support system that we can turn to. This can be a person, an book, a candle, a bath or maybe writing your feelings down in a journal. There are so many bumps in road as we go on with our daily lives. Take the time and celebrate some positive things ( making that great new smoothie, running a 5K or re connecting with a friend from your past). These things won't change the sadness you might be feeling but you need to know that your are one of a kind, and you are important to so many people. Take care Alexis and prayers for your dad.
Jan B
Alexis says
Thanks, Jan! It's so true that we all have struggles and we all cope with them differently. Sometimes I treat this blog like my own journal--it's a great release for me. Thanks for your sincere, heartfelt,and uplifting comment!
Christina @ The Beautiful Balance says
This is perfect. And for the record, I would still follow you if you posted about all of those things. It's real life, we all go through it in some way shape or form, and it's honest. You are far from negative and this post proves that.
Christina @ The Beautiful Balance says
This is perfect. And for the record, I would still follow you if you posted about all of those things. It's real life, we all go through it in some way shape or form, and it's honest. You are far from negative and this post proves that.
Alexis says
Thanks, Christina! Real life is what life is allll about.
Kelly @ Eat the Gains says
My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. This post is so well written and I think people forgot that social media is just the positives of everyone's lives (me included). Thanks for staying real and by doing so helping others stay positive <3
Alexis says
Thank you, Kelly. Social media can be a toughie!
Lauren says
Sending you lots of love and hugs lovely. It is 100% ok to cry 🙂
Keep going miss 🙂
Alexis says
Thanks Lauren!! XO
Nikkii Baker says
Hi Alexis,
First of all, I'm sending all good thoughts to you and your family, most especially your father. I hope all goes well for him.
Thank you for keeping it real. Other's have commented, saying the same thing, but sometime's it's good hearing the same thing over and over again 🙂 Probably most of us on your blog don't know you personally, but what we all know is there's a real human being behind all the gorgeous photos and incredible recipes.
Dixya @ Food, Pleasure, and Health says
sending positive vibes towards your family..there are very things that chocolate, good cry (or a laugh), and sleep cant beat. take care friend. i am here if you ever need to chat.
A says
I am so sorry to hear your dad is sick. Sending positive vibes for a speedy recovery.
Alexis says
Thanks my dear!
Georgie says
Thank you as always for being so honest and real - it's one of the reasons (beyond the gorgeous photography and delish recipes) that makes your blog so magnetic.
Praying for your family! Keep staying strong, because your energy inspires so many people <3
Alexis says
You're so welcome, Georgie! You're too sweet 🙂 I love that you said my blog is "magnetic." That really is the ultimate complement.
Kelsey Yoki says
This hit home for me today. Rough week this week, and especially this morning. Thankful for a best friend on a day like today, that understands what I'm going through and is there for me. Does wonders.
Alexis says
Best friends make a HUGE difference! I love that.
Natalie says
Ohh Alexis this is so perfect. Thank you! For being real and for crying and for reminding everyone that it's ok! It's really ok to cry! I am sending so many positive thoughts and prayers to your family. Hang in there sista!
Alexis says
Thanks, Natalie! It's nothing a little dark chocolate and rest can't fix 🙂
Shannon says
I hope everyone in your family is okay and recovers quickly. Sending happy thoughts your way! This post made me happy. Sometimes reading inspiring things is all I need to lift my mood. 🙂
Alexis says
Thanks you, Shannon! I'm so glad it lifted your mood!
Rachael@AnAvocadoADay says
Sending lots of love your way. Don't be afraid to take a step back - your blog is incredible and your followers will always be your followers. XO!
Dana | fresh simple five says
Sending all the positive thoughts and vibes your way! Over the past year and a half I've been working on making some life changes (positive ones, but exhausting at times) and some days the struggle is so real. I couldn't agree more with you about always keeping and looking for the positivity in a situation. While it might be tough at times, it can also save you and help you push through when things get tough. On those days, nothing beats a warm mug of tea or flavorful glass of red wine.
Alexis says
Thanks a million my love! Yes...the struggle is so freaking real. Positivity is everything!
Ang @ Nutty for Life says
Thinking of your family today, Alexis.
Alexis says
Thanks, doll!
Claire @ Keeping Up With Claire says
What a wonderful post. Sending positive thoughts and prayers to you and your family. I just lost my dad very unexpectedly in January and know how dealing with unexpected health issues can take a toll on you. You're doing exactly what you need to be doing - take care of yourself. 🙂
Hannah @ CleanEatingVeggieGirl says
Such a great post, Alexis. It is often times easy to forget the things that TRULY matter in life when we are always on the go-go-go. I hope everything is okay with your family. I'll be thinking of you!
P.S. I hate mint chocolate ice cream. Let's have an ice cream date sometime that does NOT involve that 😉
Paige @ Dimpled Inspiration says
LOVED this post! Seriously. Thank you for being so authentic and real. And for saying your smoothie tasted bad and that you were running late. So refreshing to read posts like this! You rock! I look forward to reading all of your blogs and recipes. Keep your head up, sending well wishes!
Alexis says
Awww thanks, Paige. That's what I'm here for! Gross smoothies and lateness 😉
Paige @ Dimpled Inspiration says
LOVED this post! Seriously. Thank you for being so authentic and real. And for saying your smoothie tasted bad and that you were running late. So refreshing to read posts like this! You rock! I look forward to reading all of your blogs and recipes. Keep your head up, sending well wishes!
Giulia says
I feel I can speak on behalf of your following to say that we love your genuine quirky personality that comes across your posts.
I am keeping you and your family in my prayers! Please know that you have so much support. Remember to take some "me" time and eat all the chocolate! XOXO
Alexis says
Awwww thanks, dear! I loved your comment. You're so sweet!
Giulia says
I feel I can speak on behalf of your following to say that we love your genuine quirky personality that comes across your posts.
I am keeping you and your family in my prayers! Please know that you have so much support. Remember to take some "me" time and eat all the chocolate! XOXO
sassygirl says
wonderful and thoughtful post. and so true. there is often a story hidden behind another
story. your blog is awesome and so look forward to your posts. thanks! 🙂
Alexis says
Sooo many stories behind stories. I love that!! There's always more than what meets the eye 🙂
sassygirl says
wonderful and thoughtful post. and so true. there is often a story hidden behind another
story. your blog is awesome and so look forward to your posts. thanks! 🙂
Kristen says
Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way 🙂
Kristen says
Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts your way 🙂
Alexis says
Thank you, Kristen!
Angela says
Big hugs to you! Sending good thoughts your way.
I love the message in this post. It's something that's been on my mind lately and the main reason why I stay off social media (as much as possible). I'm a happier person without it.
Alexis says
I think I need a social media break. That sounds delish!
Georgia says
Thanks for this post. Something I needed today, to focus on the positive aspects of my life. Praying for you and your Dad. Love your blog!
Alexis says
I'm glad it resonated with you, Georgia! XO
Anna says
One of my favorite sayings is "Be kind. Everyone is facing a battle you know absolutely nothing about."
This post really speaks to that, and I thank you.
I hope today is better than yesterday, and tomorrow better than today.
Alexis says
What an inspirational quote. So true! Thanks, Anna 🙂
Nikki says
Hi Alexis,
I haven't commented for ages, but I just wanted to send you hugs & best wishes. I'm always crying sometimes with my pain and sometimes a gooey Disney moment, for whatever reason it's always okay to cry, it releases things and makes stuff better. And proves you are real nice person not a robot
Alexis says
Thank you, Nikki. That means a lot! No one likes a robot 🙂
Ann says
Thank you for this! You are absolutely right - nobody is perfect as it may seem through social media and it is so easy to fall into thar tap to believe everything that is shown is real - and that there's nothing else. But everyone has some issues to fight and deal with. Prayers top your dad, I hope he's well again soon. There are difficulties in my boyfriend's family too lately, dip I can totally relate to how you must feel like. Hugs to you to get through hard times! ♡
Alexis says
Social media can be a huge perfection trap! Thanks for the kind words, Ann 🙂
Erin @ The Almond Eater says
This is a really beautiful post Alexis--thinking of you and your family today! <3
courtney says
you're awesome. much love and positive energy to you and yours. you've got this!!!
Alexis says
Thank you dear!
Lindsay (@LeanGrnBeanBlog) says
hang in there girl! text me if you need anything!
Alexis says
XO
Maryea {happy healthy mama} says
Not only is it okay to cry, it's good to cry. NOT crying can actually be a really bad thing. So go ahead and let the tears flow and hopefully afterwards you feel cleansed. Prayers for your family.
Alexis says
You are SO right! Why hold it in?!
Kathryn says
I have just discovered your blog today and have been devouring it. I'm a plant based veg*n myself and it's nice to find someone who eats similarly but also who has nutritional training.
I appreciate your honesty and insight. I'm sorry to hear about your family member.
Alexis says
Awwww I love that! So glad you found me 🙂
Kate says
Loved this post!
I just realized yesterday during one of the most stressful days of work I've had in awhile, the only thing I wanted to do when I got home was read my go-to food blogs that I normally do first thing in the morning (one being yours)!
It's such an escape for me, and such a stress reliever to see the beautiful recipes you post and all the healthy nutrients that go into them. It keeps me going, and is one of the highlights of my day! Keep on keeping on!
Dietitian Jess says
Thoughts and prayers with you and your fam <3 I always love how real you are on the blog and dont sugar coat everything and make it seem like life is flawless! I think you are destined for great things but that doesnt mean that arent some side obstacles you dont share with the world. Just keep being you
Khushboo says
Big hugs Alexis....thinking of you and your family and only sending positive vibes your way.