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    Hummusapien Β» Lifestyle Β» Life Β» It's Okay to Cry

    It's Okay to Cry

    Published Mar 12, 2015 Β· Modified Sep 6, 2022 Β· by Alexis Joseph Β· 218 Comments

    There's a thing or three you guys don't know about me.

    alexis2

    Like the fact that I can't touch my toes. And that I don't love mint chocolate chip ice cream. And that 79.9% of the time I'm a walking ball of stress but try really, really hard not to show it.

    It's my job to be happy. It's my job to be enthusiastic. And most of the time, I really am! Alchemy and this blog depend on it. But let me tell ya, it's not always easy to play that role. The past few months have made me cry a lot of happy tears and more than a few sad ones. My job is incredibly rewarding but just as mentally taxing. The blog is growing but my ability to set aside the time it deserves is dwindling.

    My family is coping with a few completely unexpected medical conditions, one of which happened just last night and inspired me to write this post. When you hear that the health of some one you love dearly is compromised, nothing else matters. I mean who wants to write about salmon burgers when your dad is in the hospital?

    It's okay to cry.

    At the end of the day, nobody's life is perfect. Social media may make our lives seem top of the line, but isn't that the point? I doubt I'd have much of a following if I posted pictures of a hospital bed or a failed recipe. I don't want to think about negativity and neither do you. It's toxic. We share our happiest moments on Facebook and Instagram and then we all kind of forget that that's only half the picture.

    Remember yesterday when I instagrammed a picture of my ugly smoothie? Did you know that I was running ten minutes behind for a meeting? Or that I put too much stevia in the smoothie and that it actually didn't even taste that good? No, you didn't. All you see is some cute running shoes and a healthy morning cocktail. After all, I want to inspire you, not bring you down!

    The point is that everyone has problems and everyone gets jealous of everyone else's lives. Don't get me wrong--I'm beyond happy with my life and my career and I know how blessed I am to have found my passion. But promise me you won't read a healthy living blog or see a picture on Facebook and think, "Ugh, that girl has the best life." I promise you that the person you're admiring is battling their own demons. We all are.

    It's okay to cry.

    So what's a girl to do when things are looking blue? There are a few things I do to de-stress, my favorite of which is lighting a candle. It sounds simple, but there's something about the light, the warmth, and the aroma that melts my stress away. I look so forward to jumping under the covers, propping up a pillow, lighting a candle, and responding to all of your blog comments. Sounds lame, but I swear it lifts my mood!

    Another thing I tend to lean towards when I need to unwind is chocolate. Salted almond dark chocolate, to be exact. Sometime you just need to #treatyoself. Grab a spoon and dig into some Jeni's ice cream or nosh on your favorite treat. If you're like me, then eating makes you happy. And eating good food makes you really happy.

    Of note, I'm shoveling spoonfuls of Sunbutter in my face and listening to Chocolate (by The 1975) Pandora on repeat as I write this post. Happy times.

    If snacking on dark chocolate in the candlelight doesn't do the trick, then try taking a bath and using an exfoliator. For whatever reason scrubbing dead skin away always makes me feel refreshed, and there's something relaxing about putting lotion on. Nothing like a good clean up and a warm towel to raise your spirits!

    Lastly, try to appreciate life and remember what you have rather than the things or people you don't. Remember your favorite food, your fondest memories, your best friends, your passions. Remember what makes you truly happy. Realize that they're probably not "things;" they're probably people, passions, places, memories. Remember that everyone has ups and everyone has downs.

    I already feel better after writing this post. For me, writing is a release. You guys are like my therapist. At the end of the day, you really just have to try your hardest to stay positive. What do you have if you don't have positivity?

    Most importantly, remember that it's always okay to cry. And to eat all the dark chocolate.

    Because no one is perfect and perfect is lame.

    About Alexis Joseph

    Oh HEY there! I'm Alexis Joseph, food writer, blogger, Registered Dietitian Nutritionist (RDN), new mama, and co-founder of local restaurant group, Alchemy. I use my passion for cooking and wellness as fuel to help others ignite a more freeing and happy relationship with food. Learn more about Alexis!

    5 Secrets to Delish, Healthy Lunches

    Reader Interactions

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    1. Sharon @ Savormania says

      April 05, 2015 at 5:22 pm

      This post was so touching and so nicely written, as all your posts are! I hope your dad is feeling better and that you had a wonderful holiday with the family!

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        April 16, 2015 at 10:26 am

        Thanks so much, Sharon!

        Reply
    2. Sharon @ Savormania says

      April 05, 2015 at 5:22 pm

      This post was so touching and so nicely written, as all your posts are! I hope your dad is feeling better and that you had a wonderful holiday with the family!

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        April 16, 2015 at 10:26 am

        Thanks so much, Sharon!

        Reply
    3. Ellen @ My Uncommon Everyday says

      March 20, 2015 at 10:37 am

      Thinking of you and your family! I think sometimes we extend that the overwhelming positivity we display on social media into our lives - and that's generally a good thing - but that's also what prevents us from sharing our struggles with the people closest to us. Basically, we try to cultivate an image of perfection in all aspects of our lives, and that's so unnecessary. Yes, it's so okay to cry.

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 7:29 pm

        Thanks dear! Totally with you on cultivating a false image of perfection. Cheers to tears!

        Reply
    4. Ellen @ My Uncommon Everyday says

      March 20, 2015 at 10:37 am

      Thinking of you and your family! I think sometimes we extend that the overwhelming positivity we display on social media into our lives - and that's generally a good thing - but that's also what prevents us from sharing our struggles with the people closest to us. Basically, we try to cultivate an image of perfection in all aspects of our lives, and that's so unnecessary. Yes, it's so okay to cry.

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 7:29 pm

        Thanks dear! Totally with you on cultivating a false image of perfection. Cheers to tears!

        Reply
    5. Ashley @ A Lady Goes West says

      March 14, 2015 at 3:44 pm

      Perfect is lame! I agree that we all like to see positive inspiration from the blogs we read and people we follow on social media, but we need to remember that's never the whole picture. I'm terribly sorry about the illness issues in your family and hope everything turns out okay. πŸ™

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 8:01 pm

        Thanks so much, Ashley. I appreciate it!

        Reply
    6. Ashley @ A Lady Goes West says

      March 14, 2015 at 3:44 pm

      Perfect is lame! I agree that we all like to see positive inspiration from the blogs we read and people we follow on social media, but we need to remember that's never the whole picture. I'm terribly sorry about the illness issues in your family and hope everything turns out okay. πŸ™

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 8:01 pm

        Thanks so much, Ashley. I appreciate it!

        Reply
    7. Faith vandermolen says

      March 14, 2015 at 1:11 pm

      Sorry to hear about your dad! I love your vulnerability...and that song Chocolate:)

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 8:02 pm

        Thanks, Faith! Chocolate is amazing. Both the real thing and the song.

        Reply
    8. Faith vandermolen says

      March 14, 2015 at 1:11 pm

      Sorry to hear about your dad! I love your vulnerability...and that song Chocolate:)

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 8:02 pm

        Thanks, Faith! Chocolate is amazing. Both the real thing and the song.

        Reply
    9. Tara says

      March 13, 2015 at 7:48 pm

      I love your blog and have consistently found it a great way to get motivated to be healthy. Your blog has inspired me to not only cook and eat real food, but also to not be so hard on myself and love who I am in the process. Some of your recipes are my "go to" weekly recipes when I'm feeling too tired, sad, or exhausted to cook. I hope you know that you are an inspiration and motivation to others and that maybe that can help you get through rough times. I'm so sorry about your family member and hope all is well soon.

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 8:07 pm

        Thank you SO much, Tara. That means a lot to me. I love that you've found some go-to's! That makes weekly meal prep so much easier. Thanks again for your uplifting comment!

        Reply
    10. Tara says

      March 13, 2015 at 7:48 pm

      I love your blog and have consistently found it a great way to get motivated to be healthy. Your blog has inspired me to not only cook and eat real food, but also to not be so hard on myself and love who I am in the process. Some of your recipes are my "go to" weekly recipes when I'm feeling too tired, sad, or exhausted to cook. I hope you know that you are an inspiration and motivation to others and that maybe that can help you get through rough times. I'm so sorry about your family member and hope all is well soon.

      Reply
      • Alexis says

        March 23, 2015 at 8:07 pm

        Thank you SO much, Tara. That means a lot to me. I love that you've found some go-to's! That makes weekly meal prep so much easier. Thanks again for your uplifting comment!

        Reply
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