I usually post "Lovely Meals Lately" on Wednesdays but since life has flipped upside down this past week, those posts will likely be on pause for a while until things gets more "normal." I may continue to post more lifestyle content on Wednesdays depending on how things go. Writing continues to be a creative outlet for me, and I'm endlessly grateful for that.
How I'm Feeling Mentally
I was admitted to the hospital Monday evening for a 4-ish week stay due to my vasa previa diagnosis. I have a c-section scheduled for January 4th when I'll be 36 weeks (that's the max they'll let me go), so I'm sending out all the good vibes that he keeps cooking in there until then and that my time here is very uneventful!
I feel super comforted here surrounded by wonderful doctors and nurses who can get lil man out safe and sound if he decides to make an early entrance. Hopefully he’ll arrive like his mama...fashionably late!
I'd gotten in a really good groove hibernating at home, balancing the restaurants, getting in recipes for the blog before baby comes, and overseeing our bathroom renovation. If Jeff (or anyone) were allowed to keep me company in the hospital room, this experience would be another ball game. He isn't allowed to stay with me until I deliver.
The good news is that I'm not at all on bedrest; and I am allowed to meet hubs (or a friend) outside for about an hour. I can also meet him at the Panera that's super close to the hospital, so that is definitely something! I feel really safe since no students are on campus right now plus the no visitor policy...it's pretty empty everywhere minus hospital staff.
I was handling the impending hospital stay pretty well up until this weekend when the reality of leaving home for a month really sank in. Jeff and I both got super sad, but then he suggested a Backstreet Boys dance party and I felt WAY happier!
Many of you have asked how I've stayed so positive throughout this experience. I'm focusing majorly on gratitude for this healthy baby and how easily we got pregnant, but know that what you see online is just a small glimpse of what has been a very disheartening time for us.
I woke up Sunday, the day before I was supposed to leave, with a horrible stomach virus. It started with crazy painful cramps that had me worried I was going into labor! After chatting with my doc and realizing it was GI related versus my uterus, it eased my mind. I ended up vomiting all day (luckily it held off for my lovely virtual baby shower!) and eventually it subsided late in the afternoon, endless Gatorade and saltines later.
Did I mention I got my first ever nosebleed as we were walking out the door to go to the hospital? What a time to be alive!
My limits have definitely been tested these past few weeks, to put it lightly. Every time I think "why me," I have to reframe my thoughts to "why not me?" Perspective is everything.
Nurses and doctors are checking in on me constantly so between that, FaceTime with friends and fam, and all the normal work I have to get done for Alchemy and this blog, I'm staying busy and trying to keep some structure to my day for sanity's sake. The love from our family and friends plus the support from this online community have truly made this change SO much easier.
I'm praying to be moved to a room with a window here soon. I need natural light! My sweet roommate is only 18 years old and had her water break at 20 weeks, so that was a serious dose of perspective on how lucky I am to still have baby in my belly at 32 weeks.
I think weekends will be a bit harder when my drive to work wears off, but I have plenty of books, shows, coloring activities, etc to keep me entertained. I'm really just trying to stay positive so stress is low for baby!
It's not easy being pregnant period, let alone during a pandemic. It varies by hospital, but with hubby not being able to come to any prenatal appointments nor stay with me til I deliver, it's been a real challenge. Then there's post-baby when Covid will likely be peaking and I won't be able to have friends and family visiting like normal. It can all feel really isolating.
To any mamas out there going through this alone, a friend sent me this sweet video and it really uplifted my spirits. And on the bright side, at least when everyone is cooped up inside anyway, we'll have the sweetest baby to snuggle!!
What I'm Eating
Breakfast right now is a bunch of non-perishables I packed from home (oatmeal, cereal, banana, apples, pb, bagels), Alchemy Meal Prep for lunch, and a wildcard for dinner (bless Jeff for bringing lasagna, salad and garlic bread last night!). I've worked at this hospital and I know the food isn't the greatest, so you know I came prepared.
Since food is one of the few joys in my life right now, I'm trying to keep eating things I love! Being in the restaurant biz definitely makes the hospital food dilemma easier, so I'm thankful for that.
It's so weird to wrap my brain around not cooking for a month and then not being able to do much when I get home either given the surgery. I'm just embracing the required rest! Luckily Jeff is whipping out Hummusapien recipes to keep us fed (he's bringing buddha bowls tonight!) and my mom will be visiting when baby arrives. She's a great cook and a baby whisperer, so that will be a huge burden lifted for us!
(My plan to do my hair and makeup for the shower clearly didn't come to fruition, LOL.)
Sending virtual hugs and so much gratitude for your uplifting messages. Love you all dearly!