So today I want to talk about periods and feminine things that might seem uncomfortable to talk about but are actually infinitely important for us to talk about. Right here. Right now.
And this here is a churro waffle salted caramel ice cream sandwich because....Monday.
Today I want to chat about why the absence of menstruation, or hypothalamic amenorrhea, isn't okay. I've seen articles floating around the webosphere suggesting that not getting your period is actually a good thing. Wahhhhttt? After screaming into my pillow and wondering how on earth people can be so ignorant, I decided to handle this how I handle most situations that fluster me into cranial chaos---by writing about it.
Now it's important to note that not getting your period can be the result of many different conditions. See a doctor to eliminate possibilities like PCOS, ovarian failure, hyperprolactinemia, or genetic abnormalities. While genetics and stress can play a huge role in your cycle, nearly all of the women I see don't get their periods because they're a) not eating enough or b) working out too much.
When we under-fuel our bodies and/or over-exercise, menstruation takes a back seat. Your body doesn't really care about your reproductive system, your body temperature, your hair, skin, or nails when it barely has enough energy (ahem, calories) to maintain vital functions like keeping your heart beating and brain buzzing.
Just like literally everything medically speaking, we are all very unique. While your best friend may be able to menstruate on a 1,200 calorie diet or a gym routine of running twelve miles a day, you may not. Increases in stress-related hormones like cortisol, which is released during exercise, can lead to amenorrhea. That means that over-exerting yourself at the gym is a surefire way to lose your cycle. Again, your body is smart and it's going to conserve its precious energy for what really matters, and that's keeping you alive. Burning away half the calories you eat puts your bod in a pretty tough spot. Just like you can't expect your car to drive across the country on a quarter tank, you can't expect your body to exert more energy than what you're giving it. Every single thing that happens in our bodies, from blinking to sleeping to riding a bike, requires calories. And lots of 'em!
My personal period saga begins in seventh grade. Come high school, the terrible cramps, super long and heavy cycles, back pain, and near fatal mood swings drove me to get on birth control like the rest of the universe (or so it seemed). I got my period every 28 days like clockwork and my cycle only lasted about four days rather than seven. Birth control had me in period HEAVEN. Those were the days when my friends and I thought it was normal (maybe because our doctors told us it was fine?) to purposely skip our periods and to take the Plan B pill whenever we forgot to take birth control. We treated our bodies like they were automatic machines.
Fast forward a while to grad school. My best friend went off the pill and then I did, too. I don't have anything against the pill and realize it's the preferred method of contraception for tons of women (including myself for many years); but I decided I didn't want to be taking a hormone every day. It took a while for my period to come back and I didn't think much of it. My body needed time to adjust, right? It wasn't until later that I learned that post-pill amenorrhea actually isn't an evidence supported conclusion at all. I studied up on menstruation, read No Period, and learned that bleeding every month on the pill doesn't mean you're actually getting your period. Yes, your birth control may very well be masking the lack of a real cycle.
I didn't get a period for more than six months after stopping birth control and my doctor told me it was fine. She didn't ask me if I was stressed, if I was eating enough, or if I was exercising too much. She didn't ask if I was a perfectionist, if I may have issues with food or body image. Did you know research shows that women who don't get their period have "higher levels of perfectionism" than those that get their period regularly? The only question she asked me was if I wanted a prescription for some pill that would induce a period.
Looking back, I probably should've looked a helluva lot closer to my body. Was I eating enough? Was I sleeping enough? Was I managing my stress properly? I didn't think twice about taking that pill back then. I was the typical consumer who wanted to walk out with meds that would magically solve my problem. Lifestyle intervention? As if!
I took that pill and I did eventually get my period back. The weirdly amazing thing was that my miserable PMS symptoms never came back, nor did the terribly lengthy cycles from pre-birth control days. Our bodies change. Pre-birth control menstruation doesn't always equate to post-birth control menstruation. And hallelujah for that!
Luckily I haven't had any issues since. But if I were to not get my period again, I surely would not turn to medication. I would turn to myself, to my body, and how I'm caring for it. Sometimes caring for it means a giant green smoothie and sometimes it means feeding my soul a warm donut.
Fast forward a bit to me discovering LOLA, a female-founded company that delivers the cutest box of organic cotton tampons right to your doorstep. I found them because I really, really like mail. Mail makes me happy. I also liked the idea of turning my period into something fun and exciting. Getting pretty wrapped tampons in the mail is totally fun and exciting. I wanted to not loathe but actually celebrate my period. That goes for my clients, too! My period makes me feel strong and sexy and womanly like I can do anything. I mean I could birth a freaking human if I wanted to!
Being super into food and what's in food, I started to explore what's in tampons. It made me feel warm and fuzzy that LOLA was transparent about the ingredients in their tampons, pads, and liners. No rayon or polyester or mystery fibers---just 100% organic cotton with no added chemicals, fragrances, synthetics, or dyes. With their customizable subscriptions, you can leave those frantic drug store trips behind you!
How much does this subscription cost, you ask? Applicator tampons (made with BPA-free plastic) are $10 per box and non-applicator tampons, pads, and liners are each $9 per box. For subscriptions with more than one box, LOLA offers $1 off each box in your subscription, so two-box subscribers save $2 and three-box subscribers save $3. They offer free shipping and you can cancel your subscription at any time. I appreciated the fact that you can pick from light, regular, super, and super+ so you're not left with a box full of the size you don't need. We've all been there. LOLA delivers exactly what I need, exactly when I need it.
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So here's the thing. Not having a period isn't just abnormal. It can have serious long term side effects. If you aren't getting your period, your estrogen and other reproductive hormones are low. So besides dull skin, a super low sex drive, and the inability to conceive in the short term, amenorrhea can lead to brittle bones, fractures, cardiovascular disease, early cognitive decline, and dementia in the long term. Losing your memory from lack of menstruation? You bet.
I had a client once that used to do bodybuilding. She told me that her teammates would brag about who hadn't had their period for the longest. The sad reality is that there is indeed a body of women who pride themselves on this because it means they're restricting in some way. That they're in complete control. You are so much more than that.
There's really no answer to how long it will take to regain a period, but if you don't have a condition like PCOS or another genetic factor, the chances of getting it back with proper nutrition support and exercise education is extremely high. It could be two months and it could be two years. What I will say is that regaining your cycle likely means stopping all intense exercise, finding meaningful ways to cope with stress, and eating not just more, but a variety of foods. Changing your thoughts surrounding food and exercise and body image is not unlike changing your religion (this podcast on the religion of dieting is gold). It's not easy. If you're in this boat, I highly recommend reading the book No Period and seeking nutrition counseling from an intuitive eating dietitian in your area. The tools for success are inside you but sometimes it takes a little outside boost to let them truly shine.
Not getting your period is not cool. Period!
This post is sponsored by LOLA. Thanks for supporting the brands that make Hummusapien possible!
Nancy Westberg says
I’ve been on more a for about a year and a half I’ve stopped having “periods” I still get moody and little cramps. But for the last week or so my breast have been super sore. Touch or just normal bounce during walking. I’ve been crampy along with the sore breast but not the same cramps as I usually get. Any ideas?
Alexis says
Hi Nancy! I'm sorry but without knowing your personal medical history I can't be much help!
Kendall says
Thank you for this insightful, open post. I actually just went to the doctor today for period-related issues. I'm a teenager and got my first period about a year ago. I only got it again five months later and I haven't gotten it since. My MD dismissed my lack of period
I'm 5'7 and 107 pounds, which I realize is pretty thin but this is just my body's natural size.
I exercise about five times a week and eat pretty healthily (including things like pasta and milkshakes but in moderation).
But I just got back from a three week vacation where I didn't work out at all and ate ALL the delicious foods hahahah and didn't get period, so it can't be that anyways.
Any thoughs? Thanks so much!
Alexis says
Hey Kendall! Thanks so much for sharing your story. There’s a lot of factors that influence menstruation and I’d have to know your full medical history/have you as a client to legally give you medical advice. That said, it’ll likely take more than a few weeks of normalizing eating patterns to regain a period. It could take anywhere from 6 months to a year, varying person to person. My best advice without knowing your history would be to continue to eat a variety of foods including enough fat and carbohydrate and ease up on your exercise (or focus solely on walking/yoga versus vigorous exercise) so your body has enough energy to menstruate. If you’d like to talk further feel free to email me at alexis@hummusapien.com. Hope that helps. Thanks!
Jane says
Not getting your periods suck because then you might think you are pregnant!
Average Mom says
Such an interesting topic! My daughter lost 20 pounds and started exercising like crazy when she was in ninth grade. We are a very fit and healthy family so of course we praised her for this svelte new look and for working so hard on her body. She stopped menstruating so I made her an appointment with the ob/gyn. I wanted her to have an open conversation with the doctor without me hovering, so I stayed in the waiting room. The doc said it was normal and suggested the pill. I thought that was a fine solution (after I was assured there wasn't any deeper issues going on like bulimia , etc.). She went on to college and suffered a bad boyfriend who made her insecure, leading to binge drinking and eating and eventually 40 extra pounds. This time, we tried a highly recommended therapist. The lack of a period way back in high school was a huge red flag we missed, marking the beginning of a very unhealthy relationship with food, because we, like so many other well-meaning parents, place a high value on appearance and social life and academics. We've had to take a long, hard look in the mirror at ourselves and make some changes. I'm certainly guilty of calling myself fat when I look in a mirror (size 4), and my husband and I both make crack comments about people we don't know when we think no one is listening (like "wow, what a whale!") She's thriving now post-college and we've all grown from her struggles. We're closer than ever and make sure to praise what's right about ourselves, rather than criticize what's wrong.
Emma says
I have always been irregular and was told I was too thin (not!), exercises too much, too little, had PCOS then started with Mirena and my period was totally absent for over a year. Since I was traveling in places that were really off the beaten path, I was lucky I didn't have to deal with it. But now that I am back home in the U.S. I worked on getting it back again through working with my naturopath through self-care, some hormone balancing, and after removing the IUD I am on a 28 day cycle for the first time ever for the 3rd month in a row and I am so excited that I am regular. Hate the pain, but I'll take it knowing my body is in working order!