How's it hanging? We've had some absolutely gorgeous weather here in Columbus. What a treat!
An Unexpected Diagnosis
I shared last night on Instagram stories that we got some disappointing baby news at my follow-up scan on Monday. Before I go into the details, I must say that the outpouring of encouraging words, personal stories, prayers, and messages I received yesterday truly brought me to tears and I cannot begin to put into words the gratitude I have for this community. It has made all the difference in my outlook.
I mentioned in my Second Trimester Update that at my 18 week anatomy scan, the doctor suspected I may have placenta previa and/or vasa previa. I was put on pelvic rest and told to come back for another scan at 28 weeks. On Monday the maternal fetal medicine doctor confirmed I have vasa previa, which is a rare condition where baby's blood vessels are exposed and unprotected over my cervix.
That means the blood vessels could rupture and be life threatening if I were to go into labor naturally and have a vaginal delivery. In an effort to avoid this, I'll be admitted to the hospital at 32 weeks (in about a month) for close monitoring and proximity to the operating room and deliver the baby via planned c-section likely between 34-36 weeks. She said 36 weeks is the farthest they'd let me go, as baby's risk of being inside gets greater each week than his risk of being outside (prematurity).
Jeff can't join me at appointments due to Covid, so you can imagine what it felt like to receive this news by myself. I definitely broke down from the overwhelm of hearing I'd potentially have a premature baby and that I had to leave for the hospital in a month.
It's hard not to resort to "why me" in these times but the reality is that we have all been faced with huge curveballs this year, to put it lightly. I'm so grateful to have gotten pregnant as quickly as we did, and that baby is totally healthy. That's all I can ask for!
Thank God that I have an incredible support system to help me sort through the emotions. The doctor kindly spoke to my mom and Jeff and explained everything to them.
I'm scared. I'm anxious. I'm dreading bedrest. But I'm also incredibly excited to meet our sweet baby boy earlier than I thought we would! I've heard from countless women who delivered anywhere from 25-35 weeks and have wonderful, thriving little ones. It's been beyond encouraging to hear from you mamas!
I know it's ok to grieve not having the birth I hoped for. I also know that my attitude is everything right now.
I've been challenged in many ways over my lifetime, and every time my resilience is tested, I come out a stronger, more grateful, and empathetic person. I know I'll look back on this experience and think, "I wouldn't have it any other way."
The journey to motherhood certainly isn't linear nor "perfect" for anyone. Sharing these realities is so important to me to help normalize the beautiful imperfection that is this journey. There's a reason everyone says motherhood is the most amazing and the hardest thing in the world!
Now let's talk eats before the background of every photo is a hospital room! LOL.
Lovely Meals Lately
Apple cinnamon pancakes with peanut butter, maple syrup, and scrambled eggs on the side. Our go-to weekend breakfast these days!
Chili loosely based on this recipe that I made in the Instant Pot. I didn't use any carrot, celery, or tomato paste but I added sweet potato, regular potato, Brussels sprouts, and zucchini that needed to be used up. I find chili is so forgiving in that way!
I put everything in except the beans and cooked it on manual for 9 minutes then quick released the pressure and stirred in the beans and some lime juice. I served it with cornbread and freshly grated white cheddar on the side.
I whipped up a batch of these date-sweetened chocolate banana muffins and added a bunch of chocolate chips. So delish!
I had Jeff take care of dinner one night, which was this foil salmon (defrosted from frozen) plus two bags of Trader Joe's sweet potato gnocchi (our favorite) and salad. I love that this is a fairly quick meal that lasts for two nights.
Egg sandwich with arugula, pickles, whole grain mustard, avocado, and havarti plus a super yummy rose chia yogurt bowl from new café Emmett's. Delish!
An epic s'mores brownie from Harvest Pizza.
Whole grain English muffin with avocado, EBT seasoning, and eggs. Coffee on the side, of course!
Peanut noodles but with raw veggies (cabbage, snap peas, and carrots) instead.
Cannot get enough of this apple cinnamon bread, also great from the freezer.
Have the best week and thank you again so much for reading, supporting, and just being here!